#funemployment

you know, i will never say I am not grateful for something, seeing as i learn a lot from all types of situations - the ones that suck, like my cousin dying at age 13, the ones that are amazing, like marrying the man of my dreams or moving to oahu.

lets talk about funemployment.

so.  this, for me, means i am between jobs and utilizing my vacation time to get a break between jobs.  i don't know that my previous company would like me announcing that, but hey.  i agreed to stay an extra MONTH to help my boss out (nope, nothing about how they cannot live without me or need me to stay.  she was going on vacation and there was no one to cover).  so for that, i negotiated my last few days vacation at the end of those thirty days.

this decision to leave my company was not made lightly, and really, probably is a bit rash and foolish. we do not have a lot of savings, we have credit card debt, and rent on oahu is three times our mortgage payment in arizona.  a gallon of milk, yes, is $6 for the cheap stuff.  so smart? no.  necessary?  yes.  then...when i put in my notice, they didn't even say thank you for the year i have worked my butt off.  guess i have to manage my expectations a bit better...

i am going to open a practice, i said.

i am going to change the world, i said.

then?  boom.  job opportunity out of nowhere.  i mean NOWHERE.  they came after me and talked about how much they have heard about me and i'm a good fit and would i please consider it.  so i did.  and i am.  and then the woman making the decision went on vacation for five days prior to an official offer.

whoa.  FUNEMPLOYMENT.  here i come!  everyone should follow their dreams...everyone should take a risk. never know what lurks on the other side...

xo

#newlife

i really thought this job was my new life.

turns out i was wrong.

this job was a stepping stone to the life i was meant to live.  really.  i could talk about the nasty management meetings, the having to confront my bosses, the whatever, but the truth is, i am so grateful to what this job has taught me about myself and what i do not want.  i know they think i was happy there and i was, for much of the time i was there, but wow.  a weight will come off my shoulders when i walk out the door next week.

look at this life i lead.

it. is. amazing.  that sunset!

i'm grateful for the journey of the last year and i'm grateful for change.

OH.  AND THE BEST NEWS?

our best friends are moving here next year.  yesssss.  its true.  kristen and jason will officially be hawaii residents in august of 2015.  i can't wait.  ready to live our crazy, dog filled life with us?  c'mon.  it'll be entertaining at least.

xo
h

a real runner.

The other day, I set off at 9:00 am in Kailua for a four mile run.  I'm training for my seventh (whoa) half marathon, and this was an "extra" training run but I was feeling all out of sorts. (Running seems to the best thing for that, at least in my world.)  I left the dogs at home as Peanut has been quitting a lot lately, right around mile two.  That's no good for me.

I started jogging to warm up my muscles and thought about how hot the weather was.  No matter how hot it was in Arizona, it NEVER felt like this particular piece of summer has felt on the windward side.  I'm aware that it is summer, thank you, but but rumors promised me rain and easygoing trade winds almost daily...

I got about a mile in and realized sweat was flying off of me like it hasn't in a long, long time.  I felt tired and a bit nauseous, then cursed myself for eating chocolate and drinking stout for dinner the night before.  I knew that poor fueling was my own fault, but man, I was wishing for a big bowl of spaghetti in this particular moment.  Even my morning coffee (standard before anything less than five miles; most foods upset my stomach during short runs) felt like a hundred years away.  I kept thinking about that stout - wondering why it wasn't fueling me more.

And then I realized.  I just finished three miles.  I didn't even think about it.  The last I could remember, I was at a half mile.  I JUST REALIZED I BECAME A REAL RUNNER.  Not the "I'm going to run an ultra" real runner, but the kind that doesn't quit because I'm tired.  I told myself I was going to run four miles and I did...I ran, without thinking, without convincing myself to, OH MY GOSH I GOT LOST IN THINKING WHILE RUNNING!  I've been waiting for this day since the completion of my first half marathon, Phoenix, 2008.

My mind cannot wrap itself around this.  I feel amazing.  I'm a real runner.  The kind that keeps going, no matter what.  I'm joyful.